This may be a short or long post- at this stage, I can't tell. But I really wanted to blog about this as it feel it is something that a lot of new bloggers, like myself, feel. For the past month, especially the past couple weeks, I have been feeling so down about my blog. I hate the way it looks, I wish it was easier to change around and I am getting frustrated as I can't find anything that does the style or layout exactly how I want it.
Why did I start hating my blog? Don't get me wrong, I still love blogging. If I could, I would upload a post every day. Right now, however, I am finding it difficult to get a post up a week. This is to do with important things happening right now that I need to sort first before I can blog. Due to not posting as much I want, I feel like I am failing as a blogger. This is when I start ripping my blog to shreds as I sit and compare my blog to other successful ones. I am hoping I am not the only one that does this. I sit and I say 'omg, their blog is so much better than mine!' And it starts to get me down again about it. Make no mistakes, I can see the amount of effort people put in their blogs and I admire them for it. I really want to start putting the same effort in with this blog but I find it frustrating as I want to change sites, buy a domain and change themes, but I don't know how! So if you have any tips, please email me at [email protected] Frustration with technology is something that can really get to me. Especially if I can't get something to work or look how I want it too. I try to take nice pictures but it is so frustrating when the photos don't come up the way you want them too or you can't get the lay out you want with your theme. Those are things that really capital P, pee me off you know. Like how am feeling with my blog design just now. Feeling like I am getting nowhere. I hate when I feel like haven't put the time aside to post a blog post or to go out and take pictures. I really beat myself up about it and it gets to me. I can't seem to learn that it is okay not to post for a while. If I don't post for a while, which seems to be happening a lot right now, I feel like I am failing that I should give up. I don't think I will ever give up, but it does demotivate you when you think you are failing and you put yourself in this vicious circle. The pressures to be unique nowadays is unreal. Sometimes, I feel like I am the tiniest fish trying to swim along the bigger fish but I keep getting pushed out of the way. I think we, indeed I, sometimes forget that blogging is a personal thing and it shouldn't be a race about who can get to the top the quickest or about who can get the most subscribers. It's about doing what you love and finding a joy in what you do rather than relying on the positive feedback of others for you to feel good. Don't get me wrong, a nice comment now and again can really push you to work harder and better at what you love. But please, don't be blinded by the pressures of blogging. Stick to what you love and be yourself. I would much rather read a post or watch a video where you can see the enjoyment in what they post. I'm sorry for the rambley post but I am hoping I am not alone in feeling like this and that some people can relate to this. If you do, please talk to me, would be great to talk to people about it all. And if you do feel the same way I do right now, don't give up and stop comparing yourself to other people. Stick to what you love. Thank you, and I will see you soon.
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